Week in review: 1/25 - 1/29

Whew! I looked at the Dew this morn and realized it'd been a week since I last wrote something. Can't let that happen again, but it's been a busy week and I seriously just didn't have the time or inclination to write anything beyond what I had to write for work. Anyway, here are some odds and ends and various insights from the week past:

• Happiness is a short commute. Preferably in my own car. For the past 10 or so years, both here and in Texas, my commute has been about 10 or so minutes and never more than 15 - yes, yes, thank y'all for the catcalls and nasty names. This week, however, I had to go to a conference down at National Harbor which is not that far away, right? Wrong. My commute to the other side of the Potomac went something like this: Leave apartment, wait in the cold for bus, ride bus to Pentagon, wait in the cold station at the Pentagon for train, ride train to Huntington, wait in the cold at Huntington for shuttle bus to NatHar, ride shuttle bus to NatHar. All told, about an hour to go 13 miles. Fuck that and the horse it rode in on. Twice, since I had to do it in reverse at the end of the day. I would much rather have been sitting in my car for that entire hour.
• The previous realization also redefined my search for a house. How much? I'm not sure, but we'll see in the months ahead.
• I liked the President's speech on Wednesday. There was a bit of smoke and mirrors, but he addressed some of my biggest concerns (deficit, debt and energy policy), rightfully scolded Congress for its lack of action on anything, took the blame where he should and, in general, set what I think is the right tone for his second year.
• Speaking of NatHar, the service in their eating establishments hasn't improved any since I last went in May 2009. In fact, I think it's gotten worse. My burger came out wrong, it was undercooked (slightly), the service sucked and, best of all, when I put down a twenty for my $15.56 (or so) bill, the server only brought me four one-dollar bills as change. Now I know and you know that change was probably going to be part of the 10 percent tip he deserved for the shitty service he provided, but wasn't that my decision to make? Technically, he was stealing from me and it took an enormous act of will to even leave to leave another $1 bringing his tip to 9 percent. Am I wrong in this?
• Seriously, 60 degrees on Wednesday and 10 on Saturday? I generally don't mind the cold but this is fucking ridiculous. Wake me up when spring gets here.

Hope everyone had a good week, can you believe January is almost over already? Seemed like just yesterday I was returning Christmas presents, drinking Champagne with friends on New Years and getting dumped by a text message.

And, since it wouldn't be Friday without a joke here's what's quite possibly the funniest joke I've heard in a very long while:

A minister is checking into a motel and asks the front desk clerk, "I presume the pornography channels in my room are disabled?"

The clerk replies, "No, our pornography is the regular kind you sick fuck."

Snips and Snails…

How appropriate is it that Friday the 13th falls the day before Valentine’s Day? Of course, February 13 always comes the day before Valentine’s Day, but for some reason I’m intrigued by the coincidence of the two dates this year.

I’m wondering how many men are going to make decisions today or, rather, more likely fail to make decisions that will to lead to disasters tomorrow. It’s funny when it happens in the movies, not so funny when you’re personally involved.

In this life I have loved three very different and exceptionally beautiful women and, amazingly, been lucky enough to have them feel the same way about me. Just writing that sentence brought a smile to my face as memories flood back. I don’t know if three loves over the course of my adult life (so far) is a lot, but it feels about right. (Yes, for those of you asking, scientists are hard at work trying to figure out how three women could have fallen in love with the Foggy Dew. Seriously, this is Nobel-level work.)

The funny thing is for those three beautiful faces there are nothing but the vaguest memories of Valentine’s Days past. The only way I can explain it is when you love someone, February 14 isn’t sooo important because you demonstrate your love every day. Not just once a year in a big, over-the-top commercial way.

The memories I do have of Valentine’s Day are of those February 14ths when my reach exceeded my grasp. The ones that didn’t go … quite so well. Why is it a holiday dedicated in our minds to love is so often seared into our memories because of (generally male) screw-ups and forgetfulness?

We men are, at our essence very simple creatures. Barely evolved beyond single-celled organisms in some ways. You have to remember for us it’s not so much just having the thought count, but rather the actual physical act of engaging our brains beyond the necessary imperative drives of food, shelter and … and … Hey look! The game’s on!

In “The Break Up” Brook says, “I want you to want to do the dishes.” To which Gary gives the perfect, unfiltered guy response: “Why would I want to do the dishes?” (Note: I don’t mind doing the dishes, this is merely an example of typical guy thinking.)

Translated to today and tomorrow’s events it could also be written this way: Honey Bunny, “Oh, you don’t have to do anything special for Valentine’s Day. Just being with you is enough for me.” Dude, “OK.”

See? Simple. Literal. And then we wonder what we did to piss off the women we love.

This year I find myself quite single and, unless something extraordinary happens in the next 24 or so hours, February 14 will pass me by quietly. It’s a very slight disappointment personally because, no matter what I’ve written above, society-at-large demands coupling of us all. But I’ll deal with that.

I’m a guy.