Sticky Information

I always find the bumper stickers, and the combination of stickers, people slap on the ass ends of their cars interesting. If one catches my eye, but can’t quite read because of location or distance, I’ve been known to maneuver my car for a better look.

And while I currently don’t have any bumper stickers on my car, I do have two UNC window stickers. On my first car, a trusty and loyal blue Dodge Shadow, I had a “Give Blood, Play Rugby” sticker which was later replaced, along with the bumper, with “He’s Not Here…” and “Support Your Local Brewery” stickers.

This morning I was behind a full-size pick-up, it’s entire rear bumper plastered with those annoying oval three-letter stickers. Although, I will add, it was done in a kinda cool overlapping and random pattern, and included one reading “FU2”. For those of you who’ve never spent any time around Ham operators or military communications, FU2 is shorthand for “fuck you twice.”

So I got a little laugh out of that.

The other interesting combination I saw would, to me, seem counterintuitive. On the back of a Camry or Accord two of the bumper stickers read “One Nation, Under Educated” and “John Stewart ’08”.

Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good laugh as much as the next guy, but it would seem to me if you got your news from a source other than a comedian we might just make a dent in that education problem.

Maybe? Then again, maybe not...

We see them everyday as we drive or walk or Segue around town to-and-from work or, more likely for some of you reading, bars.

Bumper stickers proudly adorning the rear windows and bumpers of our friends' and neighbors' cars. Haven't seen one on a motorcycle, though, I guess the two-wheeled crowd has more respect for their hard-earned iron.

With this being a leap year the most abundant of these mobile messages tend toward the political. One of the most popular I've seen reads "01-20-09 Bush's last day" which, I must say, is about as creative as "Monica Lewinsky's ex-boyfriend's wife for president."

Anyway, this picture is of one of my neighbor's cars:

It's pretty easy to figure out who they're voting for come Nov. 4. It would have been funny a few years ago to make fun of them for not only supporting democrats for national office, but they must really be a masochist to pull for the Sox.

What I found most interesting, however, is that all three of these bumper stickers (four counting the Sox sticker) are Scotch taped to the inside of the window. A close-up to show the detail of the fine taping job:

To me this shows a certain lack of commitment to the cause. Their cause, of course, not mine. The last bumper stickers I had on a car read "He's Not Here" and "Give Blood, Play Rugby." At the first bad turn in the campaign they can be removed in a fit of pique. Such weakness is not becoming in a campaign.

Or, should the McCain/Palin ticket prove victorious in November, they can be quickly ripped down to avoid "editing" by the Ministry of Truth.

I always kinda laugh when I see a Kerry-Edwards or Gore-Lieberman sticker, but at least they've shown a conviction of their ideals. Tattered Bush-Quayle or Dukakis-Bentsen stickers are just sad, however a Nixon-Agnew sticker is prudent. You never know when Tricky Dick may be back dead and buried or not.

I say if you're going to support someone don't hold back. Peel off the back of that sticker and slap the sucker on your bumper.